Unconditional Love
Recently, a dear friend made a statement about our world that was hard to hear. She said: “Not many of us, living in this world today, have experienced the kind of unconditional love that will fly across the world to sit with her child during a severe loss; and even more so that counts it a privilege rather than a sacrifice.” Think on that for a moment.
And, think again, I’m sure we’d all love to be the recipient of that kind of love, either again or for the first time, now realize — we can be the one who gives that kind of love. How astounding is the fact that this image of God’s love is the very thing that God desires to put in each of us. It is so much higher to be the giver than the recipient. (Or in the words of the Bible: It is more blessed to give than to receive.)
Now, take a look at your darling sleeping baby girl or your two year old baby with a poopy diaper or older daughter with a poopy attitude and realize that God longs to put that kind of love in her — and He wants to use your life to do some of that. That was the thought that made me get back out of bed to write you. One of my readers must have needed to read that. I think I needed to realize that.
Thank God we don’t have to do that ourselves! Goodness! That would be too over-whelming to even attempt. Thank God, that we can’t do that. Only the Almighty, All-powerful can do that. All we have to do, is follow closely behind the Good Shepherd, Who will willingly lay down His life for His lambs. He will teach and He will do. As we follow Him, He can transform us so that we then can teach and we can do.
So how do you even start? How do you, a tired mama, whose plate is full just trying to get herself through life and who seems to have bitten off more that you can chew by adding a child to the mix? (Throw in an occasional foot in the mouth, and it’s more than impossible.) But, I want to encourage you today, that you already are training your child to allow unconditional love to fill her heart and life and, like a powerful river, flow through her.
First off, you care enough to read this website. Its contents are not for everyone. And no doubt you have prayed for wisdom and help in parenting and have read some really good resources, several have been listed at http://www.raisingdaughtersoftheking.com/books.php. Secondly, you love your child. Daily your little one experiences your love. Start the instruction by simply naming it. If your daughters are in their teens, this may be a little harder to do, so use your discretion. By talking about what you are doing and what is in your heart, you are training your child. I don’t really want to put examples here because I think you know what I mean. You are not trying to look like a martyr by describing your sacrifices, but you are simply educating your child. If you need to start by telling them why daddy works so hard, start there. But if you cannot speak of your loving tasks that you do for your child or cannot train them to say thank you or be respectful to you, then I’d say you may need to examine your self-esteem. I found it difficult at first, to tell someone (even my child) to say thank you, but it is so necessary to value myself as Christ does so that I can teach my children to value themselves as Christ does.
The good news is, the more you practice this, the easier it becomes. The more you train yourself and your daughters to look for and see love, then it is easier for them to see opportunities for love, all of this prepares your child to hear the soft whispers of the Holy Spirit as He guides her (us) to allow Him to love through us. Recently, I’ve heard people say that a characteristic or a learned talent becomes part of one’s DNA in order to emphasize that habits can become a part of us. There are some crazy things I’d love to change about my DNA and there are some genetic traits of mine that I wish I had not passed down to one or more of my beloved daughters; however, there do exist characteristics that I can allow God to form into the growing character of my newborn, or toddler, or even my adult daughters. Find that which you feel is worth fighting for, and go for it, sister! Faith, hope and love, but the greatest of these is love.