Raising Daughters Of The King

A Game PlanNovember 2015

1. Be a mother who can say “no” to her daughter if that is the correct response, and stand on it.
2. Don’t change your mind because of whining or tears or arguing. Follow scripture and let your yes be yes and your no be no. If you haven’t decided, then make your answer a firm maybe so they know that YOU have to decide.
3. If your sweet child pitches a fit because she did not get her way, allow some grief but put a limit to it. Do not permit loud or extended crying. (That is often their way of complaining and punishing you or trying to convince you to give in. If you give in, you have just reinforced that if they cry or pout long enough, they will get what they want.) Teach them to “get over it” and not to brood. Being able to control her own moods so that she can move into a pleasant mood is not only a gift to her but to her future husband and children.
4. Teaching her to cultivate the ability to be content whatever the situation is huge in our adult life. Eventually, expressing thankfulness through circumstances is Scriptural and also has proven to be a release of stress.
5. Teaching our daughters to realize that the world does not revolve around them is another huge gift to them. That realization eventually will come, but the sooner they learn that, the less trauma to their lives.
6. Teach them that they are not perfect, that they make mistakes and bad choices (called sin), and that they need to take responsibility for those things — and that they are still loved unconditionally even though there are consequences to their bad behavior.
7. Teach them to obey authorities and rules as long as they are not unethical, immoral or illegal activities. Sometimes it is good to explain the reason behind the rules. This causes our children to learn to reason and think and make good choices. But, sometimes, it is critical that our children learn to obey simply “because”. God doesn’t always give us reasons behind His commands, but He always has a good reason — we don’t have to understand an infinite God with our finite minds; but we do have to obey. If we as parents, can help our children understand that obedience is important, we have gifted them with one of the greatest gifts to move them into a relationship with God. It may be easier on us to explain because many strong willed children are more compliant when they understand, but then, we have chosen the easy way for ourselves and the hard way for our children. Please understand: If you train your child to control herself in spite of what she wants, you have given her a gift far better than a kingdom. In fact, (Proverbs 16:32). says He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city. The phrase “because I said so” when used by a parent who has earned trust and shown respect for the child, is a blessed phrase and amazing lesson.
8. As for me: I chose to be willing to swim against the current of the world in the way I raised my girls. It’s never been the easy way, but it has always been the best way for me. Study God’s way of raising and dealing with His children. He will give you the step by step as you genuinely seek